You Can Let Go Now

"Sometimes, letting go is a good thing." This is what my friend said while watching Titanic. She was referring at the part where a couple just accepted the fact that they cannot survive the tragedy no matter what. They gave up trying and instead, they just held each other and faced together whatever will happen next.

Letting go is a good thing. I know that. I believe that. When you get to the point where you know it's not going anywhere anyway, you have to quit already. When he had said it so clearly that you are not the girl who will sweep him off his feet, and when you had told him that he is everything that you don't want in a man, then there's no point lingering to each other. You are each other's passing phase, an experiment among the many, a stepping stone to self-discovery and growth, and a friend in a relationship that only you two can define.

Yes, he's been in your life for a long time already. Through distance and time, you were able to sustain whatever relationship you have. But it's simple: you're either in or you're out. There's no in-between. You cannot invest emotionally. When you talk about your long-term plans, both of you are not in each other's future.

It was good while it last. Some really good thing happen in our life and  nobody else has to know. He's one of those good things. I know you did your part to stay away from him. There was also a time when you realized you cannot do it on your own, that you cannot let go on your own. But it wasn't enough. You needed to hear from him that he does not want you, that it's better for him to forget you, and that he wants you to go away. But you never heard him say these things. In fact, he always reaches out. And you were always too willing to accept him all the time. Well, you have to stop now. Do this for yourself. You don't deserve him. You don't deserve someone who will only be there for the "fun". You deserve someone who could actually imagine you growing old with him. You deserve someone who will be there for you forever. Someone who will take care of your heart and only your heart.